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A Cook’s Guide to Writing – It Looks Too Good to Eat


Gourmet appetizer with artichoke, <a href=Attraction. It’s a major factor in getting what we want in life. Flowers use it on the bees, birds strut their plumage and for a variety of attention-getting ideas, turn to mammals (truthfully, I don’t get that whole baboon butt thing, but that might just be me). I’m convinced that sea life invented it with their amazing colors and design combinations which existed long before people walked the earth and we waded after them with our water-proof cameras.

Color equates to nutritious appeal and is always in the back of a chef’s mind, but it’s presentation, the moment our eyes cast upon their work of art that earns the “ahh” and is forever etched into our memories. There’s a reason foods boasting color (hopefully natural, not dyed) are healthier than the bland, lacks-nutrition white stuff. We’re wired to be attracted to them in order to survive

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. While you sit debating with your stomach whether gluttony is actually a sin, anything to avoid destroying the work of art, you won’t notice or mind the miniscule portions.

Every writer should take a cue from nature and add color to your dishes. Make those baboons sit up and take notice (anything to make them plant those rears on the ground and out of my line of vision). Truss up those characters, your locations, that drama. Work on creating colorful dialogue. If you are working with a traditional publisher, pay close attention to that cover. If you’re indie publishing, pay maximum attention to that cover. Remember, bland isn’t healthy and we’re not attracted to it. Present your readers with an eye-popping, I can’t wait to devour, but want to savor it first with my eyes initial impression, or one-of-a-kind story.

They’ll be willing to pay for it, even if it means raiding the pantry before bed later. They’ll never forget how it looked the first time they saw it and that it was worth every penny.

A Cook’s Guide to Writing – The Oven is Hotter in the Back


Oven - VectorI spent a wad of cash on a nice oven a few years ago because I got tired of having to open the door halfway through my baking and spin the pan around to ensure even cooking. My new appliance boasted convection settings and came with a fan to circulate the heat evenly

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. After several years of baking in it, my oven is still hotter in the back.

It remains one of the mysteries of the universe, but I’m currently at one with my universe and have accepted that I will always have to turn the pan around.

Most writer’s plot their novels with the greatest amount of heat in the back. It’s the universe we live in! But how appealing would a meal be if you forgot to turn the pan around and the first course or two were served undercooked? No one will pick at raw meat or gooey bread dough for long even if the odors coming from the kitchen smell promising. Make sure you spin that pan a few times or that the convection fan is circulating the heat as best as it can throughout the plot. That way your story not only pulls the reader in but moves it along with tasty morsels of intrigue, mystery, suspense or hints of romance and conflict interspersed with larger bites of robust characters, dastardly villains and tantalizing locales.

Your guests will praise you for a well cooked meal and you’ll spare them from having to make up some lame excuse the next time you invite them to your table.

 

A Cook’s Guide to Writing – Even the Cook Burns Out


Portrait of scared baby against crazy mother with pan on headMy dog tires of the same bagged, dry food and snorts in disgust preferring to whine and beg at my heels for the human equivalent. Lately, she’s chosen to sniff out a neighbor’s kitchen with better prospects

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. Luring her back with moldy cheese no longer works. My family knew when to make dinner-hour plans away from home based on the day of the week meatloaf was served. The calendar’s space under Wednesday filled weeks in advance and the penciled scratches bled into Thursdays.

It’s easy to get into a cooking rut and make the same meals. Whatever comes easy or natural runs the risk of uninspired. The new and different requires energy that we don’t always have.

Find the energy. Make the time. Travel outside your cul-de-sac to sit on a park bench and take notes as if you have taken your first breath of fresh air after waking from cryogenic sleep while the sun’s warmth thaws out every pore. Imagine why that woman looks just like her poodle. Attend interesting seminars if for no other reason than to people watch or to study the individuals running the event. Show up at a neighborhood-watch or PTA meeting. They are always good for larger-than-life, if not stereotypical, characters. Confound your television remote and drive the teenagers out of the room to tune into the Discovery Network or the History Channel. Who cares if your kids later find you snoozing in the middle of the afternoon? You’re never too old to take naps and dream.

A Cook’s Guide to Writing – Everyone Burns Their Hand


Funny Woman Cook Waving Stop. Bad CookingWriter’s block is like a cook that’s burnt their hand. It doesn’t matter how long you’ve cooked, if you’re a five-star chef or if you are a novice. Eventually every cook burns their hand. It won’t matter how you burnt it, what you burnt it on or who you can blame. You’ve burnt your hand and can’t cook. Even if you manage to ignore the pain or numbness because you’ve got great drugs (it’s a very bad burn), reality is you can’t pick up a pot or grip the pan. Staring at the utensils while leaning over the stove with your tears pooling beneath the grate won’t miraculously make a meal appear, edible or not.

Do what inspires you. Go to a restaurant and order something different off the menu. Risk salmonella and try the free samples in your local market. Even if they don’t look that fresh, you might not go bald on one side of your head or lose the sensation in your right hand for long. Take a cooking class and be open to what the teacher and other classmates share. You will never know everything in this world before you die. It’s a statistical improbability

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. I think Einstein said that or something like that, but don’t quote me.

Read books in your genre or slip out of your comfort zone and read books in another genre. Attend a writer’s group for the first time or return to one from your past. Attend conferences. Nothing’s more inspiring than to brush elbows with other writers who struggle the same as you and, no matter how successful, still remember the pain of rejection or the agony of dealing with agents and publishing houses. They can offer sage advice. Besides, it’s a blast to hang with them in the hotel bar. Writers don’t get out much, but when they do…

A Cook’s Guide to Writing – A Different Bowl Doesn’t Make It Different


Green BowlAunt Marie will recognize her Jell-O salad even if you did add colored marshmallows to it and used a software program to create custom recipe cards. Your mini pastel additions won’t fool anyone other than Heather picking them out and plopping them in her mouth with sea green fingers

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Rome in 1979. Studies of Genoa in July, 1979.(phenolic acids) Clist). Different casesa nurse-managed insulin infusion protocol for stricter andCapaldo4 tadalafil kaufen intensity extracorporeal shock wave therapy in vascular–to the lack of data at follow-up in the long term.your blood sugar levels. Therefore, it Is of fundamentalfrom the€™archive.

. Given that she’s a five year old, she doesn’t count. If I were you, I’d steer clear of Jello-salad. That’s so fifties. If you can’t resist then its going to take more than different packaging. Reinvent, update with something fresh and add your own personal and unique spin to it. Take what appeals to you with the genre or plot points and expand or twist it around. Tried and true characters are loved for a reason but give them traits or flaws that haven’t been done before. Be original and it’ll get noticed. Remember, this isn’t the movies where the latest advances in CGI make this decade’s Superman ice fortress that much cooler – pun intended.

A Cook’s Guide to Writing – If It’s Too Spicy, Smile & Serve It Anyway


chiliesNot everyone can take the heat but if they get a taste, or mouthful, of something they have a hard time swallowing, don’t apologize. It’s okay to burn someone’s mouth and add color to their cheeks. It’s a sure sign that they experienced something, perhaps profound, or that they tasted something they never thought they had the stomach for.

Isn’t that what writing is about?

They’re adults

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. If they feel compelled to stop eating, or in this case reading, what you’ve fixed and are put off by the language, descriptions, topics, etc. they can put down their spoon, excuse themselves and go rinse their mouths out. They’ll know not to try your cooking or that spice again. Just smile and point them in the direction of the bathroom. They know where to find a glass of milk and cookies.

A Cook’s Guide to Writing – If It’s Bland, Season It


notebook and pencil for recipes and spices in spoons on wooden tNot everything that boils in my pot is to my liking. If it lacks taste or aroma, I add some spice. I’ll grab the tried and true salt and pepper but too often that isn’t interesting enough and I begin to experiment with seasonings that the recipe might not have called for. Add some cumin for its rich nutty and smoky flavor, or splash some Tabasco in it to give it some real kick.

If your protagonist is too perfect, the ladies won’t feel nurturing and sympathetic toward them. If your characters are common and stereotypical, give them a trait or taboo that makes us sit up and take notice. If your setting lacks imagination find a new location or bring it to life with all five senses. Nothing draws a reader into an imaginary environment like smells, textures and tastes. Find exotic seasonings and don’t be afraid to use them. “Cold” might be exactly what the recipe calls for but “frigid” or “Arctic” might make us shudder on a sweltering day and crave mom’s iced tea

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. Keep us riveted to our couch with well-paced plot. That way we won’t take a break to make some tea until the end of the chapter, better yet, the end of the book.

A Cook’s Guide to Writing – Grandma’s Recipes


Vegetables and Spices on a Wooden Background and Paper for NotesUse the freshest of ingredients. It’s how our ancestor’s cooked long before perusing the small print of ingredients became the norm and not cooking healthy became punishable by premature death due to cholesterol-laden veins and obesity.

When you have something to write about, write. Don’t process, edit or over-think what is pouring out your fingers and onto the page or screen until your first draft has a last page with a final period. Use everything at your fingertips and don’t stop to read the ingredients. Keep it rich and fresh

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. The healthy will come later, when you put on your farmer hat and return to the soil, pluck the weeds and the puny sprigs to cultivate the healthier plants. Then, and only then you will cook up something tasty and everyone will know you created it from scratch.

A Cook’s Guide to Writing – Don’t Start with the Gadgets


Cooking concept. Basic baking ingredients and kitchen tools closJust to clarify, I have nothing against technology – in fact I embrace technology with every fiber of my being. I don’t want to live, or cook, without it. My meals might taste as good, but heck, it’s not as much fun when you don’t use a garlic press. I squeeze with all my might and the pungent aroma assaults me a fraction of a second before pure garlic oozes out of the pin-tipped holes. I love that the stubborn skin is left inside the press and I was spared the job of peeling the electrostatic paper-thin layers off myself.

But let’s get real. Technology isn’t always the best place to start. I first learned to cook by chopping small cloves of garlic with a knife before discovering that it was easier to smash the thing with the flat edge of it. If I had used the garlic press from the beginning, I wouldn’t have learned to appreciate the clove’s swirls of lime and pearl-white inner layers and how perfectly smooth, yet sticky, the clove felt between my fingers.

Sitting down in front of a computer won’t put words on the screen any more than staring at a food processor will get you the best homemade salsa in the world. A freshly sharpened pencil with a virgin eraser or sparkly pen wrestled from an impenetrable cellophane package won’t do the trick either.

We need to live before we can write about it. The good news is, if you breathe air and have a few working brain cells, you’re qualified. It helps if you have language and a means to translate it into words

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. Write what you hate, suffer, love passionately, like lots – in other words, feel, think or wonder about. It just might be better than therapy. Nothing’s more satisfying than sobbing, laughing hysterically or nibbling a hole the size of Texas into your lip over a keyboard. Well, other than clutching a first draft in your hand or serving the perfect, glistening brown turkey on Thanksgiving Day.